Holiday highlights 2011

Well, we had our version of “The Four Christmas's” this year – literally 4 in this house - but I think it went rather well. I am sitting here sipping a cup of lemon tea – leftover from the 45 tea boxes that that the kids and I made. My back hurts a little but overall I think we are no worse the wear for having fed and gifted over 50 people in this house over the past week.
Actually – to be honest- and my parents know this full well – I am not a Christmas person. As a child I dreaded the season because of all of the “hub-bub.” I look back now and realize that my parent's “hub-bub” was really just them pouring their lives into a million people at once. I am sure they made some mistakes – and I am sure we made some mistakes this year as well – but I imagine as adults my kids will look back on their childhood Christmas memories the same way I do mine – just a blur of abundance.
You can never out give God. Once, He gave His life for us – so that we might have life in Him – and that life is more-than-enough abundant. There is no shortage of time or resources – there is no shortage of space - EVER. And everything you give, you know in advance will be returned to you tenfold. Maybe you give a meal and get a moose stocking cap. You really have no idea what is coming your way... but you have the freedom to give because you know that the One who has limitless resources has secured you in love. Like my dad always says, “God will get it to you if He can get it through you.” So I guess that is the miracle of Christmas – to partake in the joy of loving the world. There is no doubt in my mind – this Christmas we were blessed far beyond any blessing we could ever give... as usual... as always.

A Top ten (or so) of Christmas memories?

Making reindeer "welcome mat"s and candy houses with Jude's class



Mrs. Sparkman receiving BJ's old T-shirts – and Katie re-gifting lotion to my mom at the church Christmas party

A foot of snow

A Posada on the Hernandez front porch

The annual Christmas program at church... with my shy shepherd.

Watching the Tippy family build a nativity in our garage

Watching my children play so well together with each other's toy

A holiday scavenger hunt


A Stafford potluck Christmas Eve lunch that lasted till dinner and then a little longer

Random dog and moose stocking hat gifts


Chinese Hot Pot – that lasted 3 hours


Santa and Mrs. Claus... and all her kisses



Homemade snow ice cream and homemade eggnog

Charades with the guys and the students

Jude's note to santa (And the subsequent re-using of Halloween candy)


The five minute Christmas stories that Aunt Sandy sent the kids... listening to Jude read Lucy Christmas stories

Listening to Jude laugh at “Home Alone”

A family snowball fight in which Lucy quickly defected to the "boy's team"

Jackie's 5 desserts and Chrissy's “extra” - Donald's Golden Corral rolls (That the Saudis think I should buy every night now)

Yep..... it feels good....

A graduation and a goodbye

Well, we have been preparing for Marrina's graduation from the MBA program and departure this whole semester. And yesterday we attended a small ceremony to recognize her great accomplishment. Congratulations Marrina! AND... she is not leaving us yet – Hurray. We have another semester secured with her. - and hopefully it will be a semester full of life-learning and time together.
As we celebrated this we also commemorated the “moving on” of our friend Tony. He has lived in the basement for the past year, and we have all grown to love his quite, mature, and sincere ways. We are not business people – and today I would rather not think of who will fill his space in our house... because no one will fill his space in our hearts. His situation was unique – as a married man in his thirties with a four year old half way across the world, his struggles were different than the other students, to whom he meant so much. His approach to life in the United States and studying was different as well. His leaving us is also unique, in that, though we will miss him, we hope not to see him again until his family as at his side.
For me personally, Tony has done more to remind me of the blessings of my life than any other person I know. Living with strangers – it is often awkward to share our worst family moments as well as our best. But no matter the blood-curdling fits my children threw, or the icy stares my husband shot my way – no matter how hard my family got my blood boiling – I could look across the table at Tony and see his clear eyes say, “You have them Amanda. They are here with you and that is enough.” No matter the weeds in the garden or yard, the leaks in the roof or basement – no matter the misplaced tool or broken hose – he would walk by my frustrated labors with eyes so full – as if to say, “You young kids, with no marketable skills – have a house – have a yard – and the time to take care of them both – I will work until I am 80 so that my son has a chance at a life like yours.” And my mind would cease to complain. Tony gave me an appreciation for my life. He had a crazy fun-house mirror reflection of my life effect on me- where everything bad became beautiful. This gift of true gratefulness for what I already possess – I think is the greatest gift one friend could give another.
He also gave honesty. He would often disappear from our lives for days, sometimes weeks at a time – studying, or just working through life with people in Chinese. But sometimes I think he avoided us because he couldn't help but be honest about his feelings and he didn't want to be honest. One of my most memorable moments with him was on Thanksgiving day. In the van on the way to Branson I was playing a game with the children and a few of the students, “Name 10 things you are thankful for.” After we had completed and had a few minutes of silence Tony said to my children, “Ok – now let's name ten things we hate.” I said, “ok Tony – you go first – what do you hate?”
“Oh – I hate A LOT of things.” This simple English honesty was a moment I will never forget – him baring his soul – that life is beautiful yes – but it can be ugly.
So Tony, Thank you – And I hate that China and your family are so far our house and our family. We hate that. But we are thankful for you.


After 12 hours at Silver Dollar City - we still weren't buying our kids food from the stands - Tony got Lucy a pretzel... silently - as if to say, "I don't know why you aren't feeding this kid but I've had enough - she can't starve."

You asked for it!

(From Jarod)

Ok Amanda, you have asked for it a thousand times. A Love Letter. You know me. My mind does not work like a literary masterpiece. It is much closer to a technical manual. It is precision based and as short as possible. So while this will not be as full blown as something you would write, unlike your writings it will not masterfully weave themes that can be followed and discovered, it will not even have clear sections, points, or highlights, it is what it is.

My Love letter to you.

You are by far the most beautiful, exciting, loving, volunteering, and generous person that I could hope to be with. I would be lost without you. You have filled my life with adventure, friends, companionship, and joy (not to mention kids). There is no where I would rather be than with you. Since the day we left Hays for Portland, I have never had to wonder if I would see my best friend. From the day we left Hays for Europe, I never had to think about missing my favorite person. From the day we left Hays for Honduras, I never had to ask if I would be alone in a place where no one understood me (though maybe I would have learned spanish if I had). I love that I have begun to grow old with you. And because I am incapable of using adjectives and having you edit and fluff this up would loose all of its rhetorical effect. I have decided to include some photos instead to show the wonderful times we have had over our half-lives together. I wish that you always knew how much I Love You.

Half his life

So, my husband turns 30 today - and he has officially spent half of his life loving me. Poor thing. There are only two things the man does not do well in life, and sadly the consequences are the hardest on him. He does not pick women or jobs that are easy to love. Other than that - I honestly can't think of any personal failings the man has.
He's brilliant. I've always know it - but it is fun to have his sister in med school and students studying for the LSAT and everybody affirming, "You know Jarod - you could really do this." He could. He could do anything. I hope there comes a time in his life where he just gets endless hours to study all the things he wants to know. I don't see it happening - but it can be my birthday wish for him. (I think he wants to make a sterling engine this year... but my dad has been wanting to make a steam engine for 30... so we'll how it goes.)
Also, he can fix anything. And that comes in so handy with me around - because boy can I break things. Sometimes (because I am horribly morbid) I think about what I would do if he died. And after dwelling on all of the emotional pain that the kids and I would go through I begin to think about the practical side of things as well. And then I think about the fact that I probably couldn't even access all of our photos and videos if he died and then usually I start to cry. (Don't tell him that though because he already thinks I'm crazy).
I don't really worry about him dying ALL THAT OFTEN because physically I think he is in pretty good shape - though I nag at his horrible eating habits and the running joke of this year has been that he has literally gained 50 lbs since we got married. But still - you'd never know. Although I may have to worry about caring for him for 30 years after he gets crippling diabetes. Or him being brain damaged from a non-helmeted motorcycle crash. But I guess turn about it fair play...
Because he doesn't just take care of our stuff. He takes care of us. Oh, so well. You know I am sitting by this fireplace that he and my dad installed last year? LOVE IT. Jude is out playing some game with him in the mancave. He always has time for those kids... even when they are driving him insane. LOVE IT. I may have a tendency to complain but when it comes right down to it - I know I am a princess. I know I could sit around all day eating bon-bons and watching soaps and he would take care of us and love me just the same.
And I guess that is why I love him the most. Because he has always - since the moment I met him - he made me NOT want to sit around and do nothing with my life. He honestly makes me want to be a better person every day. He believes that if we want something we can make it, if we have a goal we can achieve it, if there is someone we want to help we we should - no matter the cost or inconvenience, and if we want to follow Christ with all of our hearts - we can do that too - tripping, falling all over ourselves and being genuinely a mess is really not a problem - it is just a part of life - get back up and keep going. He has experienced grace and he gives it freely - to me and others.
He is a good man... my old man... and I can imagine nothing greater than grow up... growing old and growing better by his side.

So here is the deal Dear. In this, your thirtieth year of life, let's try you cutting back on the junk food and I will try to cut back on breaking things. I'll let you go to bed an hour earlier if you'll get up a half an hour earlier. Promise. We both need our beauty sleep these days. Oh - and you need lotion. If you'll put lotion on this winter before your hands start to bleed, I'll THINK about ironing those shirts. Kay? Hope you have a great year, love.

Holidays have come ~ Asli has gone

The Holidays have come to 703 Fort. We got the tree this week, baked dozens of Christmas cookies, enjoyed the first snow and hot fire simmered wasal. The nativities are arranged and rearranged, the stockings are hung and the gift giving has begun with joyous cries as all the students opened their personalized ornaments from Joan and Bob. I received a few things today as well. I got my office back, and I practically got a new wardrobe and library from all the things Asli left behind. But we lost a friend. And all the gifts and beautiful or comfortable things in the world can't replace a relationship. Thankfully, nor can all the time and the miles in the world steal a relationship. Today, with a deep heaviness but relief in my heart I knew what I had always hoped – the bonds we have built within these walls will never be erased or replaced.
Of course things will change... and today we morn those changes. The children morn the loss of their constant companion and playmate. The only masters student I know who is willing to put off studying to play Zoobals. The renter of the i-pad, the bringer of laughter and stories all around. I am morning the loss of her slippered feet shuffling into the kitchen at the first clank of the dinner pans. To ask what we were having, to offer a needed suggestion, lend a helping hand, or tell a tale of a Turkish food that is “So delicious – Amanda, we can do it!”. And of course who will suggest an addition of garlic yogurt to everything and lemon in every soup? Who will skype transatlantic dinner tales, and make me feel that my daily routine is something news worthy? Who will remind me that my naughty, naughty children are someones love worthy? Who will listen when I just want scream about miscommunications and unmet expectations? My office seems so pointless to enter without someone to share it with. Today, we morn these things.
We morn the loss of our beautiful Dorthy, our Skype queen, our friend. We'd rather she were within our walls – but we know, “there is no place like home.” So go – go home, our friend. Travel safe and find your family well. Enjoy the faces and foods, places and warmth of your culture that we know you have so dearly missed. May your future be as bright as your laughter – the love given to you as broad as the love you have shared with us. May you continue to teach others by example what it means to enjoy life and live faithfully and honsetly toward all those who you hold in your heart. May you pursue truth and find it – may you build a home and dwell there in peace. We can not pray enough good and beauty on your future life, because we could never have imagined such beauty coming into ours.




Dear Asli - I took this photo after we made your shoes because I knew at that moment you had left a mark on our lives... Thank you.